Well, it has been a long time since I have last posted anything. I periodically go through a 'schlump' when I think "who am I to think that I have anything that anyone wants to hear?" And so I stop writing.
I think my blogging tends to be like my journaling - sparse and then heavy on content. So I will try to be more consistent and concise and not so consistently 'heavy'.This past summer we spent two months in Ohio with my family. It was good. It was hard. It was boring. It was busy. A little bit of everything. I feel it was especially boring for David since he really doesn't have any friends in Ohio that he is still in contact with and so he just hung out with us. But, it is what it is and so we do what we can.
We were then in Pasadena, California. I was excited about living in So. Cal. again. Then I had a bit more trepidation. I'm definitely not used to the traffic or the noise. I guess I'm a little spoiled in that way from living in Wooster, OH and Camarma de Esteruelas, Spain.
The semester went well for David. It was a quieter time for us all, not as much for Sam. We have a great time with the kids over Christmas, though having 7-8 people with different ideas as to what
they'd like to do, sharing a 2 bedroom home for 3 weeks did have it's challenges.
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Steve proposed to Olivia on the 23rd so that was fun, though our one son arrived with a fever and the flu and then our other college aged son came down with it the next day. They were healthy enough by the 'engagement day' to participate in the fun. Thankfully, no one else got sick!!They returned to Trinity on the 11th and then we went into packing and sorting mode. And saying good bye mode. We flew out about 2 weeks later on the 26th, arriving the 27th in the evening here in Spain.
We are now involved in getting David caught up with what he missed (it takes a while) and looking for housing. I confess that I struggle with patience and trust in this. The criteria we have for the place we'd like to live are:
1. close enough to the train station for anyone going into Madrid on the train can walk.
2. close enough to the bus route to Camarma so David or whoever can walk to the bus stop to get to the school each day.
3. a home with 4 bedrooms so we can have 1 room for Sam and Jill, 1 room for David, 1 room for Sam's office and 1 guest bedroom.
4. a storage unit so we can store our camping stuff, bikes, etc. - everything we've accumulated over almost 20 years here!!
5. a garden or terrace where we can have our picnic table, fire pit and BBQ so we can have guests and hang out outside.
6. Within a certain price range
We have found 2 that are close. One lacks the place to be outside. The other lacks the extra bedroom for guests.We are leaning towards the smaller one with the possibility of being outside. We have yet to see it but we're thinking it will fit well. The only problem is that it is available in May, not now. The other one is available now.
We are currently living in our old home, in the upstairs part of the house. It is a small bedroom, our own bath and Sam's big office/storage room where David is currently on a mattress on the floor. He's OK with that but I hate for him to spend another 2 1/2 months on the mattress.
We are sharing the downstairs with 3 single teachers from the school here. We try to stay upstairs as much as possible when they are home. It really is a decent arrangement. They are gone most of the day so we can do what we need to do downstairs. I can pack, clean, do laundry without being in their way. Then we come upstairs and hang out and give them their space once they get home, other than me cooking and us eating in the evening
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The hard part is that we do not want to bother them or be in their way at all or make them feel awkward.
I guess for me the hardest part is that I want to find our place and get settled and get on with life. I want to set up my home and decorate and have people over. I want to get out of the way of the ladies and let them do what they'd like in their own home.
Sometimes when I think about waiting another 2 1/2 months, a part of me rebels. I KNOW in my head, though, that if the home that God desires us to have is the one where we need to wait, then he will give all of us grace to live together and wait. I KNOW in my head that he knows exactly where he wants us to live and it will be available when HE wants us to move. Until then, he wants us where we are. But my heart has a little more struggle being patient and waiting. I don't TRUST. If I truly believe to the depths of my being like I say that I do - that God is in control of and leading in every tiny detail of my life and my 'job' is to listen and step out in faith and trust when I sense He is leading, then waiting will just be another opportunity to wait and trust. :-) And I really DO believe this. It's just easy to fall back into bad habits of seeing the world through my own eyes and interpretation.
If we have to wait another 2 1/2 months, then I will need to figure out what to do during that time because I had originally not planned to get involved in much until we get moved and settled. So if we're not going to be settled for another 2 1/2 months, then what do I do?
I'm sure a big one would be to help out at the school in ways that they need - in the office, subbing, etc. Another would be to get together with other ladies and listen and try to be an encouragement. I can do that no matter where I live.
And so we wait and trust. It's not a passive waiting but an active one - holding on to what I know to be true when the doubts and impatience come. Also listening and being quiet. I realize that's something very hard to do these days with cell phones and Facebook and the internet, etc. It's so easy to waste time learning things and not being quiet and learning to listen. And I like to learn things. :-) It's a joke in my family. When anyone has a question we don't know the answer to, my family jokes and says 'now Mom's going to look it up on the internet!!' I like to learn. And also the events of the world these days are breaking my heart. But do I read more about it or do I pray? If I truly believe that God is totally powerful and he has his plan for this world and that he's not surprised by anything that happens, do I talk to him about it and ask for his power, his wisdom and his eyes to see or do I get discouraged and down because of the evil I see rampant in the world?
Anyway, this is where we are. I will try not to wait so long to write but many times I wonder if people really need to hear what I have to say. Do I really need to add my 2 cents to the conversation? Hugs from here!!
Jill
